Jealousy is an ugly thing. It rises up when we least expect it and can chew us up inside. Well my green eyed monster has been rearing its ugly face quite a lot recently. I am jealous of happy people.
I am 26 and my life is not how I thought it would be. As a British girl, I watched a lot of American romances growing up and they all ended with the happily ever after and the white picket fence. And that’s what I thought I would have by this age. Not the white picket fence but my own little happy ending…. or happily ever middle… as I’m 26 and nowhere near my ending.
Yes I am jealous of couples and family’s and weddings and my sister. Oh dear. I never thought the day would come. But it’s true. I want a man of my own and a child of my own. You see these couples who have been together since school and know everything about each other and are madly in love. Well it all seems like a fairy tale to me at the moment.
Yes everyone says wait my turn and don’t look for someone and it will happen. Well when do you get fed up of waiting? What do you do then?
I am at a point in my life where I am stuck in a rut and not sure on where to go. If I had money I’d travel the world and explore. If I had loads of friends I’d party the summer away instead of Dwindling away.
A lot of what ifs. Yes I should go out and make it happen. Truth is, I don’t know how to.
Ifs, buts and coconuts.
What a conundrum. I wish I could go down the rabbit hole and have a little adventure.
Why are we programmed to want to fall in love, get married, have kids and get a dog? It’s frustrating and a long process 😂😂
Anywho… this is my latest blog on jealousy and frustrations!